Nannying and Marriage

Ugh, I've had to miss so much work lately. I hate it! I am excited to see my monkey boys again tomorrow though.
I had to spend two nights and most of two days away from my husband this week and I missed him terribly. Perhaps that sounds pathetic, but I really don't care. Even worse, one of the guys at my uncle's wedding was dressed very similarly to how my husband often dresses, and he even had the same color hair and skin tone and a similar haircut! I kept seeing him out of the corner of my eye and getting excited and then remembering that my husband was roughly three and a half hours away. I was so happy to see him Friday evening and he was so helpful in getting the bonfire started for my family. (We were at my grandparents' cabin.)


Perhaps the first audio format logo, the LP symbol appeared on countless records (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Wednesday night I got to stay with my Mom and we had a really great conversation about anything and everything on our way to her house. I really miss those. We talked about my friends and her friends, about her dog and my cat (her grandcat), house-hunting, and a million other things. The next evening we spent at a hotel. She timed me on my run and didn't even fuss at me when it started raining and I kept running!
Of course, while I was out of town, my friend LP had her baby. She had a little girl! My husband got to go to the hospital and hold her when she was only four hours old. I am so jealous. He also gave the proud new papa some peace of mind by going to their house and letting their dogs out while they stayed at the hospital for a few days, due to my friend having a c-section. However, I got to see the baby today! My husband said I was a natural and her mommy said she liked me! We were only able to stay for an hour but I will get to see them twice more this week. The little girl was a little fussy at first because she was hungry, but she soon snuggled into me and took a nice little nap once I walked her around a bit.

Related articles

• can't sleep, clowns will eat me
• Control
• Jennifer Ball: What All Women Need To Know Before Tying The Knot

Coriander (Photo credit: Ruby's Feast)

T's hydroponic garden is doing great. We have celery, spinach, basil, parsley, thyme, sage, green onions, cilantro, and dill so far! We have tasted the cilantro, but we haven't sampled the others yet. The cilantro was so fragrant and yummy! It came straight off of our balcony instead of sitting for hours in a grocery store and/or truck or however else it is transported. The only hand that touched it were ours. It has been kept safe by wolf spiders and wasps instead of pesticides. It is so much fun to watch them grow and T gets so excited when a new little seedling pops up. It is fun to watch him and his enthusiasm is contagious.
 Soon I will start nannying again and I am so excited to see my boys! They are starting 2nd grade and fifth grade this year. I am also looking forward to making more money for less hours and not being on my feet as much as I am at my current job. I hurt my knee two years ago and it has never bothered me through running, mud runs, and various other activities. However, standing for 7 hours straight on concrete does make it sore. Who knew.

Related articles

• Cheating On The Store

We like Adoption

Emblem of Hong Kong (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Last night, T and I talked about kids, genetics, adoption, and blended families. It was good. We talked about how excited we are to have kids. (I'm not pregnant, to my knowledge, but we are actively trying to become so.) I told him how I'm second-guessing every little symptom and twinge I have, wondering if it means I'm pregnant or if it's just hot or I'm just tired or ate something weird. We talked about how our kids are likely to have his black hair, since it's dominant. We talked about how even if we have our own kids, even if we get a 'matching set' (boy and girl), we'd still really like to adopt. He told me how he used to be uncomfortable about adoption, but now the possibility excites him. My husband used to think that adoption was an either/or prospect, that you either had biological kids or you adopted. However, our pastor's family includes his two oldest children, both boys, both biological, and his youngest, a little girl whom they adopted from Hong Kong. They are a beautiful family. Their daughter is thoughful and amazing and kind and smart. As are their sons. I talked to their daughter at length last night. She is also perfectly secure and willing to talk about her adoption experience. She is so very happy with her family and obviously feels like she belongs. I feel like this has changed my husband's perspective on adoption and I am so very thankful for their influence.

Related articles

• Cross-Cultural Adoption: The Do's and Don'ts for Grown-Ups
• Dream Life
• The Adoptive Mother's Dilemma - Should you label your child as adopted?
• retrospective

A Pruned Life

I have been thinking a lot about priorities lately and how to simplify my life. I need to take better care of my cat. That ties nicely into decluttering my apartment, since having lots of random crap laying around isn't very good for him. There is too much that he could get into. I've been doing better with home maintenance. Most days I at least get the dishes done. However, I want my home to be cozy and welcoming to others. I want it to be a ministry. I remember how at home I felt at the home of my youth pastor and his wife when I was younger and I want to be able to provide that to others now.

English: Pruned Holly A closer view of the pruned tree 1128589 in Vernon Park, Stockport. The burrs produced will make it interesting wood for turning when it reaches the end of its life. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I was blessed that a friend made time in her busy schedule to have breakfast with me on Friday. We talked of people who get dogs when they can't take care of the one they already have, about terrible small towns, about her brother going to seminary. We ate pancakes and laughed about our husbands' silliness. I complimented her impeccable fashion sense. Career goals (or lack thereof) were discussed.  She's excited to be graduating in December. I told her about traveling to California when I was seven. We laughed about the games we used to play with our Barbie dolls. Most meaningful to me, was when I told her that we were going to start trying to conceive next month and she responded with a huge smile and genuine excitement. It was refreshing. No competition, no jealousy, no possessiveness. Just love. From unexpected places.

T and I ran another 5k Saturday morning. My Mom came to cheer us on and we also ran into our friend Kmo, who was taking pictures for the event. Despite some technical difficulties with my ipod at the beginning of the race, it went really well overall. The miles definitely went by faster than usual and I'm thoroughly enjoying my new shoes. (My Mom got them for me for my birthday, and this is the first race I've run in them!) They are a smidge more minimalist than my old shoes and I can definitely feel the ground and how my feet are hitting it much better, allowing me to make adjustments to my stride as needed. I think we set a new PR, but it's hard to tell since we STILL haven't received our results yet. I will let you know when we do!

Awesome weekend

Image via CrunchBase

The apartment is a mess. We hates it, precious! I suppose that's what happens when I spend a night away. At least I helped my Mom strip the sheets from her bed. I can definitely tell when I visit her that my Flylady routines are rubbing off on her. It is great to see.

T and I managed to squeeze in a run yesterday before I went to my babysitting gig. Since we slacked off over the holidays, we dialed it back to week 3, day 3 of the Couch to 5k program and we'll be progressing from there. I had leftover French Onion soup for dinner and it was actually better the second time. Thanks husband! I also wore the new purple blazer my Mom got me for Christmas. It was very comfortable!

English: french onion soup, as photographed at the Woodhaven House in Rego Park, NY. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This morning T and I watched the TLC show My Strange Addiction on Netflix. I have to admit, it was a little disappointing. Learning about the addictions was interesting, but the program offered little information on the reasons for it and completely glossed over the treatment. I would have really enjoyed more details on that.

The original Dungeons & Dragons set. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Today is Dungeons and Dragons day. I'm really frustrated that I wasn't able to get my sword back last session, and now we have to play a silly game involving keeping a councilwoman from being assassinated and stopping a riot. It's still the only way for my rogue to get her sword back, so she'll go along with it until she gets what she wants. She also might get a lecture from a teammate on attacking them in order to solve a puzzle. But it solved the puzzle! We wouldn't even have gotten this far if she hadn't done that, so I considered a Crowning Moment of Awesome for my character, Dezirinda.

I really enjoyed visiting with my Mom Friday and Saturday. I was also able to watch a friend of mine audition for a play. It was so funny to see her on stage in the same theater where I performed in my first play. (As a tree.) I was also able to see one of my eighth grade teachers and her daughter, who I babysat when I was about 14. Now that I am older I can't believe she trusted me with that responsibility when I was so young!

Related articles

• Couch to 5k Week 2 Recap
• French onion soup is so comforting!

My boring life

Laundry (Photo credit: Bilal Kamoon)

Grab your milk and bread! It might sleet! OMG!

I need to stock up on groceries anyway. So I can make amazing things like pork with black beans. Poor T has been fending for himself lately concerning food, and he's been incredibly patient and gracious while I get my bearings again after the holiday season.

Laundry is going to eat my soul.

I have been reading things online about antidepressants that make me very angry and frustrated at how people will shoot their mouth off when they don't have all the information. I wish the penalty for that would be taking a course in BioPsychology. But my further thoughts on that are for another entry.

T and I had an incredibly full and fun weekend. Yesterday we gave blood. (Okay, maybe not that fun.) However, I was excited because sometimes my iron is too low to give and this time it was 14.1, whatever that means. Either way, it meant I could give, which is nice, because it's frustrating to drive all the way over there for nothing. Even if T does get to bleed. Always. It's disgusting. On Saturday we went to see The Hobbit again with my Mom, who liked it. I also got to geek out and tell the people behind us that the way the people in the Pacific Rim trailer controlled the suits was probably based on Evangelion. Friday night we took an eighteen-year-old to her first concert.

This is my pitiful attempt at putting scripture around the house. The only plain post-its I have right now are tiny, so I have to write 'crazy small'. The verse is Deuteronomy 31:8, " The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”, which I read this morning. I mean...at noon...because that's when I got up. Ahem. I'm also researching prayer, because I'm pretty sure I'm terrible at it, so if you have any ideas on that, please share.

 I've decided I want to lose 23 pounds. If anyone has anything smart to say about that, they can keep it to themselves. The first thing I ate today was a peanut butter sandwich with 100% whole wheat bread. That gives me good carbohydrates. Now I'm making eggs for protein. I have to go to bed at ten pm tonight. As productive as last night's bookshelving was, this cannot continue. And I want to snuggle with my husband, so deal with it. Another habit I want to start is praying with him before bed. I think that would be awesome. Going to bed on time would also help us to make it to the Young Married class at church, which we keep missing. 

Image via Wikipedia

We had Ari and Tay over for dinner last night. That was nice. T made some amazing onions and some pretty good chicken. The onions though...I swear they were like candy. I showed Ari and Tay some Azumanga Daioh and Kazu stretched out in Ari's lap until Tay annoyed him because he kept shaking the couch. We watched stupid Youtube videos and Tay ate all our Oreos. It was fun.

Kazu is kind of being a big butt today. At the moment, he is sitting behind me on the computer chair, but he has been rattling blinds, trying to pee on the papers in the shredder box, and jumping on the table. I think we're not showing him enough attention.

The apartment is still a horrible mess, though everyone claims that it gets better each time they see it. My next project is the bedroom. For starters, reorganizing and cleaning out our clothes. I have an Oprah magazine with some good ideas to that end.

T and I went running for 20 minutes at the Farms yesterday. Next time, (which I'm thinking will be Thursday) we step it up to jogging 90 seconds, walking 90 seconds, jogging 3 minutes, and walking three minutes. Lather, rinse, repeat. 5K here we come!

can't sleep, clowns will eat me

I'm getting old. I say this not because my birthday is tomorrow (which it is. Pi day. I know you're jealous), but because of other things. Because I don't await my next dvd purchase with bated breath. I'd rather save my money towards a three day trip to the next state with my husband. I talk about things like life insurance and taxes. I get excited about changing my name at the bank.

I worry about my Mom and Dad. It's difficult to find the balance between the new family that T and I are creating and my family of origin. I don't want to leave them behind. I worry about them. I'm terrified of losing them someday. I know I don't call me Mom nearly as much as I used to. Where do they fit into all this? It was beautiful today to sit outside with my Mom, picking at my sandwich and talking about marriage and respect and identity and femininity. She can be so smart when she puts her mind to it. That was a flicker of the old her, before a drunk driver and diabetes and an arrogant father took her strength away. Maybe I'll see more of that soon. I think it's also a result of the spiritual renaissance I've been experiencing. She and my Dad have been getting closer and closer. I gave her my copy of "Love and Respect" to read. Perhaps through my faithfulness and the testimony of my marriage, we can help bring my Dad back to the fold.

I miss my friends dearly, lately. However, I am thankful for facebook and online messaging and texting. I defy anyone who says that technology has damaged our relationships. Anna is going to GP to be a GP. I'm insanely proud of her, not just for her assignment, but for taking on the difficult task of explaining her desire for it to her parents. And honored that she wants to hang out with me (in person!) in 2015. I don't want five years to go by between seeing one another again. I need someone to go on adventures with, and she's the girl for the job. Lyss will be getting her black belt next weekend, and I plan on being there. I want to encourage her like my grandparents always encouraged me at my dance recitals. If I have any say in it, she'll be the happiest, most confident 12  year old on the planet. I will see Ari Friday night at the salsa club. We have both been busy as of late, but my anniversary card to her made her laugh, and that made me smile. I am texting Cassie, who is in Korea now. I do need to call Garrard.

Kazu is a kitty. As of late, he has been more directly playful with T and I. He will occasionally run up behind me and grab my legs gently, thereby initiating a game of tag. I make silly noises, and run around corners and gently grab or tap him while we chase each other. Sometimes I hide behind things and wait for him to pounce me. Sometimes I get down on my hands and knees and crawl around. It is fun, and he is ever so gentle. When he does get too excited, he heeds my admonitions quickly.

Image via Wikipedia

We rearranged the furniture Saturday, in between a Spycraft session and a Doctor Who marathon. (3 episodes counts as a marathon, right?) The long suffering Nick and TM helped us out. T deserves special credit, since it was also his birthday. Of course, we did bribe him with thin mint cake and a party hat, which he insisted on wearing like a unicorn. Anyway, I'm happy with the end result. We've managed to make a large space look like three different rooms, while still maintaining a sense of space and not making the tv the focal point of the room.

Doing life

Image by Tjflex2 via Flickr

I'm still living out of a suitcase. It's an odd sort of limbo, but it's worth having someone to make me lunch and welcome me home at night. Oh geez, I AM the dude in this relationship, aren't I? Regardless, we have a home. Kitty makes three. We are just making it look as wonderful in appearance as it is in essence. And cooking. We need to cook something. He cooks more than me too. I keep telling him to stop, but I don't think he can.

Speaking of kitty, he seems to be settled in perfectly fine. He is content and happy and gleefully greets me when I come home. However, he seems to enjoy chilling with Daddy. He has not been exceptionally bad or clingy. He doesn't even seem to care that we haven't moved in various things, such as his shower shelf. To clarify, this is a multiple shelf thing I had in the bathroom (and have every intention of moving into this bathroom) that had a shelf that was perfectly eye-level with me when he laid in it. He would lay there on a special towel while I showered and occasionally pull the shower curtain aside to make sure I had not drowned. Yes, this is my cat.

I miss my friends. I have barely seen anyone since I got back, except for Ari, briefly, to borrow a movie for the kids at work. She and her husband are wonderful neighbors, and it is comforting to have them near. But I want the time for someone to play with my hair while I lay my head on the table and whine and moan about my life. We have seen Nick as well. We watched Doctor Who and he adorably and excitedly asked us a million times if we had gotten the wedding present he sent us yet. I worry about Lyss, who has lost her Grandpa recently at the tender age of 12. I was 18 when I lost mine. How much difference does 6 years make? What can I even say to her?

I miss my Mom. And my Dad, for that matter. He has been incredible throughout this whole wedding business. It is a pleasant surprise. I hope that Tony and I 's marriage might reflect Christ to him. He seems to understand more what is important to me now. He seems less cynical and jaded, more open to possibilities. I want him to have life and have it to the full.

The man has a new job. He's really excited and I know it's closer to what he wants to do. It's also a bit more money, which I'll admit is nice. It frees me up to have more options as far as what I want to do for a living. But I live in fear of becoming a gold digger or a trophy wife. The need to make a living is a hindrance to me. Ever since I discovered life outside of a report card it's been difficult for me to focus on boring, impersonal things like career advancement. I want to sew and cook and decorate and train my cat. Okay, so maybe I am more stereotypically female than I thought. (I also want to join roller derby, but that's another story.

T and I are already talking about more travel. I'll make a world citizen of him yet! We actually make quite a good team, and I loved being able to solve problems and explore the city together on our honeymoon. A million times better than laying around on some beach.

Related articles

• Where in the world? (telegraph.co.uk)
• caj: ThinkGeek :: Portal 2 Aperture Laboratories Shower Curtain (thinkgeek.com)